Roxanne! You don't have to put on the red light.

Unless I want to see when I go to the bucket room. If you want regular white light, fine, whatever, boring. But, red light won't constrict your pupils in the dark, and my theory is that that's better in the middle of the night. I've never seen a red light in the bathroom, and I've read no peer-reviewed papers on the subject. Don't send me any. [On second thought, I would like to see some refereed papers on red potty-lights. Send away.] I will have no one to blame but myself when we discover that obscure article correlating red light and constipation. We have a red LED in the part of our bathroom that is only toilet. ALL TOILET, ALL THE TIME.

An RV technician, originally from New England, came to the Duck this week to look at our roof. While he was here I nudged him toward our generator. I told him the sad story: to Onan (I didn't name them!) twice and still not working. He smelled the oil, opened the throttle, looked around. He looked at the fuse and paused. Like he didn't believe what he was seeing. He pushed it in and started the generator. There ya go. No chaage for fixin' the generatah. Sure, but I bet you can't do the same thing for free to our pump switch! In two minutes, the switch was working, and I asked him what he had done. I didn't do nuthin! You must have - it didn't work and now it does. Well, when I do nuthin' and it works, I don't think about it too haad.

He had me at "no charge," and I hired him on the spot to do the roof. I wrote out a check for materials, and he took it. He looked at it silently for a minute, then asked Don't you want to check with Annie? Fine, okay, whatever. So I did, and Pants gave the go-ahead.